My Journey, My Why: The Heart Behind What I Do
My Transformational Journey with Functional Medicine: Finding Peace After Panic
In 2016, my life took an unexpected turn—one that tested my strength, resilience, and determination to heal. It began about a year after my twins were born. What should have been a joyful time in my life was overshadowed by sudden and random panic attacks. With no prior mental health concerns, I found myself in uncharted territory.
These episodes were terrifying: a lump in my throat, the sensation of being unable to breathe, the fear of passing out. Even driving on cloudy days triggered a paralyzing sense of doom, as if the world was closing in on me and I was going to die. Nights became especially challenging. When my husband left the house, I’d spiral into thoughts of dread, fearing the worst for my children and wondering how they would cope if something happened to me.
Then, I became pregnant with our fifth child, and the panic escalated to an unbearable level. Every day felt like a battle against racing thoughts and a crushing heaviness in my chest. I sought help from multiple practitioners, endured an ER visit, and was told I had “anxiety and reflux.” I was offered medication but instinctively knew that this was not the solution for me. I refused to accept this diagnosis and the meds and instead became determined to uncover the root cause of my symptoms.
The Turning Point: Finding Functional Medicine
After months of searching, I connected with a provider who revealed I had a severe Vitamin D deficiency. This revelation was surprising because I was already taking Vitamin D supplements. However, I learned that brands and co-factors—such as Vitamin K and magnesium—play a crucial role in absorption. Within two weeks of switching supplements, the panic attacks disappeared. Although occasional anxiety lingered, addressing my emotional and environmental triggers helped me find lasting peace. After 18 months, I was free from the suffocating grip of panic attacks.
A New Battle: PMDD and Mycotoxins
Fast forward to 2019, and I found myself in another life-altering struggle. This time, I experienced intense, debilitating suicidal thoughts and physical pain throughout my whole body just days before my monthly cycle. The symptoms vanished once my period began, but the pattern repeated every month. It felt like a storm I couldn’t escape. The pain wasn’t just physical—it was emotional and spiritual. I felt as though I carried the collective pain of others, leaving me overwhelmed and psychotic. Sharing these thoughts felt impossible, but I knew I couldn’t give in. My father’s suicide during my teenage years served as a stark reminder of the impact such a loss has on children. The only way I could describe these episodes were “Dark Days!”
During this time, I was working as a travel nurse in Oregon. We eventually returned to Michigan, where I discovered mold and fungus growing under our my side of the bed in our fifth-wheel camper. This discovery led me to learn about mycotoxins and their impact on health. Testing confirmed my body was overloaded with these toxins, and I connected the dots between my symptoms and my exposure to mold. I also discovered PMDD (Pre-Menstrual Dysphoric Disorder) and its connection to hormonal and environmental triggers.
The Healing Journey
Armed with this knowledge, we removed the mold and relocated to Arizona for a fresh start. I began a detox regimen to eliminate mycotoxins and delved deeper into the spiritual aspects of the female cycle. Learning about traditional cultures’ reverence for women during their cycles was transformative. Women were seen as visionaries, and their time of introspection and leading the tribe was honored. Understanding this shifted my perspective, suddenly one day as I was listening to a book about this the weight lifted from my body and instantly I was at peace . My next cycle was normal, free from the torment I’d endured for months. Those dark days have never returned.
Lessons from the Journey
This journey taught me the importance of listening to my body and seeking the root cause of illness rather than masking symptoms. Functional medicine empowered me to reclaim my health by addressing physical, emotional, and spiritual aspects of my well-being. I learned that the environment, mindset, and even the supplements we choose can profoundly impact our health.
Today, I share my story to inspire others to advocate for their health and never settle for incomplete answers. Healing is possible when we approach our bodies with curiosity, compassion, and a willingness to dig deeper. If you’re facing your own health challenges, know that your body is speaking to you—and it’s worth listening.
